


Darkness is an illusion

by FlorBexter



Category: My Engineer (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mention of Boss being drugged, Romance, feelings are complicated
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:55:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27991878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlorBexter/pseuds/FlorBexter
Summary: Thara felt the pulse of the man under his fingers, the nervous flutter, spiking, the rate faster and faster the more pressure Thara put on his neck. He was bigger than Thara, almost a head taller, but there was sweat on his temple and his eyes showed fear.
Relationships: Thara/Frong
Comments: 7
Kudos: 63





	Darkness is an illusion

**Author's Note:**

> For the **[tumblr prompt:](https://florbexter.tumblr.com/post/637462532605591552/blume-i-think-thara-is-a-chaotic-king-but-apart)** _"Blume, I think Thara is a chaotic king, but apart from that he's a bit too "perfect". I want Frong to see his vulnerable side or his dark side so they can be on more equal terms."_

Thara felt the pulse of the man under his fingers, the nervous flutter, spiking, the rate faster and faster the more pressure Thara put on his neck. He was bigger than Thara, almost a head taller, but there was sweat on his temple and his eyes showed fear.

It was a paradox, Thara thought, or maybe not. Someone who put drugs in other people’s drinks was a coward, the scum under the scum, not someone who would stand his ground. He had tried to argue against Thara’s accusations but the little bottle they had found in his jacket and Bohn who had seen him putting the stuff into Boss’ drink wasn’t something he could go against.

Bohn was ready to go for blood and the way he had his hands around the man’s collar was threatening, the way he yelled into his face and it seemed weird, Thara thought, that he didn’t seem to realize that Thara had his hand around the man’s throat. A little more pressure there Thara thought and stared at his own fingers. A little more pressure and there would be unconsciousness. Easy as that. He knew exactly where to—

“P’?” 

Frong stood in the door that led to the corridor they were all assembled in, next to him a short woman with dyed red hair, it shone like a halo with the light behind her coming from the main room of the bar. She looked petit, but her eyes were fixated on the man against the wall and it was a mixture of murderous intent and tightly contained rage.

“P’?”, Frong said again and _his_ eyes laid on Thara’s hand. Thara wasn’t sure why he didn’t immediately snatch his hand away. Maybe it was the voice in his head that wasn’t satisfied with the outcome of this. That this was his to deal with.

“Did they call the police?”, he asked, and the bar owner looked over to him briefly. Two men, giants, tall as well as broad appeared behind her.

“We are going to take care of him,” she said, and as Bohn wanted to argue Frong seemed to have enough of the situation and took both of them by their arms and dragged them with him.

“I wasn’t done with him!”, Bohn yelled and Frong let go of his arm to push him softly away.

“Boss is throwing up,” he said and nodded towards the gathering of their friends around Boss. His complexion was damp and ashy, he visibly shook and was bent over a bucket. It didn’t take more for Bohn to switch from angry to concerned and he quickly walked away.

Frong’s other hand was still around Thara’s wrist and it was the same hand he had had around the man’s throat and he stretched his fingers, startling Frong into looking down.

There was a frown between his eyebrows, but no disgust just concern, and Thara felt the need to say something. He didn’t even know what he would say. An apology, an explanation? But before he could open his mouth Frong looked up again and tugged him along.

“You should look after Boss. Duen has already called an ambulance.”

And just like that, a switch flipped inside Thara and he took over Boss’ care until the paramedics arrived.

At the hospital, he handed the little bottle over, so they would know what they were dealing with, and during all of it— During reassuring a distressed Mek that everything was going to be okay. During explaining to the ER doctors what happened. During the hours of waiting for the drugs to flush out of Boss’ system, during all of it Frong made sure to stay as close to Thara as possible. Whenever they stood or sat next to each other he touched him. He entwined their fingers, put his hand on Thara’s shoulder, pressed their thighs together or even just laid a warm hand on the small of Thara’s back.

Frong didn’t avoid touch. They had held hands or had greeted each other with a peck on the lips in public often enough that Thara knew he wasn’t against public display of affection, but this level of tactile contact was new. Not that Thara was complaining.

He just was confused.

Frong had seen him choking that guy, right?

They waited until they were told Boss was okay and that he would stay overnight. Bohn and Duen went first to pick up some clothes for Mek and Boss, followed by Ram and King, and when they climbed into a taxi Frong asked him softly: “Are you okay?”

And maybe he should have waited until they weren’t in a car together with a stranger but Frong’s calmness irked him.

“Not really,” he murmured and looked down when Frong intertwined their fingers on the middle seat. He didn’t retreat his hand.

It was grounding.

“Yeah… that was frightening what happened to Boss. It was luck that Bohn saw what happened.”

“Yes,” Thara confirmed slowly, “and…”

Was Frong being oblivious on purpose?

“You saw what I did, right? It wasn’t that dark in the hallway.”

Frong threw him a look and nodded. He started to caress Thara’s hand with his thumb and looked ahead again.

Thara felt his heart in his throat because he knew Frong wanted to say something. Had he just concealed his concerns?

“It’s nice,” Frong said and the little movements of his thumb on Thara’s hand was almost hypnotic. He tilted his head, and the street lamps of Bangkok illuminated his face in an uneven rhythm. “Maybe not _nice_ … but reassuring.”

Thara raised an eyebrow. “Reassuring that I,” he quickly glanced towards the taxi driver and bent to get closer to Frong and murmured, “reassuring that I almost choked someone?”

“Do you mean that instead of almost you definitely defended someone? That you put a stop to someone being hurt?”

“I wasn’t…” But he couldn’t end his sentence as they stopped at the curb of Frong’s dormitory and the driver turned towards them to collect his fee. Thara hadn’t even realized that Frong had told him the address of his residence.

* * *

“You make it sound nicer than it was.” Like he had been some hero. Frong looked at him through his reflection in the mirror, toothbrush in his mouth, and just raised an eyebrow. Yeah. Maybe continuing their conversation while Frong was unable to answer wasn’t the best idea, but he needed to say some stuff without Frong trying to dismantle them.

“I was ready to hurt that man! Ready and willing.” He heavily sat down on the toilet seat. It was a very small bathroom so he essentially blocked Frong’s way who could either step over Thara’s legs or sit down on his lap. He did neither. He turned and leaned against the tiny sink.

“I’m a med student,” Thara said and willed Frong to understand, “I’m not supposed to want to hurt someone.”

Frong continued to brush his teeth and seemed to wait for Thara to say something else but everything that had been in his mind was gone. Because in the end, it boiled down to him not being allowed to have those urges. It doesn’t matter how he voiced it. It was wrong.

“Let me ask you this,” Frong said finally and put his toothbrush back in the holder next to Thara’s. “If they brought the man in now, and you would work in the emergency room, and he was injured… would you help him?”

“Of course,” Thara said because that wasn’t the point and—

“You would treat him because you want to be a doctor because you want to help people regardless of what you already know about them… I think it’s allowed for you to be a human being and feel human emotion especially when your friends are involved. No one wants you to be a robot. You will have to make tough decisions soon enough, don’t beat yourself up about this.”

Thara sighed and stared down at his hands.

“Do you think they ‘took care of him’?”

Frong shrugged and pushed against Thara’s legs with his own until Thara made space for him to stand between them.

“It’s a gay bar. In the end, even if they called the police, we always have to look out for us ourselves, right?”

Thara mhmmed and put his forehead on Frong’s stomach, which was surprisingly comfortable for the sixpack-situation going on under his shirt.

“What did you mean with _reassuring_ when we were in the taxi?”, he asked, because that had sat in the back of his mind since Frong had said it. Itching and irritating.

He felt how Thara bent a bit over him and put his hands on his shoulder, massaging the tension in Thara’s back with gentle strokes.

“It’s reassuring that you have vulnerable moments too.”

“I’m plenty vulnerable,” Thara murmured. What was Frong talking about?

“You like to solve my problems, yes, but that doesn’t mean that you are as vulnerable with me as I’m with you.”

“It’s my j—”

“If you were going to say it’s your job, I will kick you out. I’m not your job.”

Thara pressed his lips together. He wanted to say that. He felt responsible for Frong, for his wellbeing, for his happiness.

“I’m part of this relationship, too,” Frong murmured and the tone of his voice told Thara that he had wanted to say this for a long time now. “You can be vulnerable with me.”

Thara knew that. But it was hard.

He breathed in, smelled the bar on Frong, the aftershave he used, a bit of the minty toothpaste. Took another deep breath and tried to breathe the tension out.

“I wanted to hurt him so badly,” he finally whispered, a broken sound, the words more slurred than pronounced and Frong was still bent over him, like a warm cage of reassurance, his hands on Thara’s back and the warmth seeped through his shirt.

“I know,” he murmured. “Me too.”

**end**

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading. I hope you had fun ^^


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